A Weakness, a True Strength
by Irwein
Summary: [NONYAOI] Sasuke's image of his brother has always been that caring yet distant figure he wishes to catch up with. But his beliefs are shattered when Itachi lashes out and attemps to kill him. Are bonds weakness or strength, it's up for them to find out.
1. Prologue

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A Weakness, a True Strength**  
_by Sirvy-cat_

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**_Prologue_**

A secuence of many dry thuds cut through the air of a nearing sunset as several razor sharp kunai embedded in the dead center on each of the targets circles; even the one in the blind spot behind a rather large boulder.

A young boy who was crouching behind a rock, stifled a cry of awe at the amazing feat that his older brother has accomplished with such ease. Lowering his small hands from his mouth, little Uchiha Sasuke quickly hid behind the rock and held his breath in order to avoid being spotted by his brother. Though Sasuke usually followed Itachi to his training area, Sasuke had the impression that his brother considered him a hindrance and Sasuke simple felt out of place, being always at his brother's shadow, crawling desperately to reach him.

"Sasuke, come out, you'll choke if you hold your breath any longer." The older Uchiha's voice woke Sasuke from his thoughts, automatically obeying his brother's advice. The seven year-old boy felt himself flushing ever so slightly at being discovered by Itachi.

Sasuke's brother had his back turned to Sasuke while he picked up his kunai, making it impossible for Sasuke to see his expression. _He's probably angry and annoyed at me, _he thought sadly, lowering his gaze.

Itachi's voice snapped him out of his trance again. "You know, if you wanted to come with me, I could have taken you out for training."

"You never take me out to train, nii-san," Sasuke mumbled indignantly, watching Itachi withdraw the last kunai. "You said long ago that you would take me out for shuriken training, yet you haven't," the boy pointed out accusingly.

"Did I?" Itachi said, his voice laced with mild amusement. He motioned to Sasuke to come near him and his little brother complied promptly. "I'm sorry, Sasuke, maybe next time." Itachi poked Sasuke lightly on his forehead as he usually did while he said that frase, making Sasuke to recoil a bit. "Let's go back, it's getting late," Itachi added. He turned to leave, but suddenly stopped when the sound of metal cutting air reached him. Swirling around, Itachi saw his little brother positioned to throw his kunai.

"Just watch this, nii-san!"

Itachi found himself warning his little brother not to push himself to do something he couldn't do just yet. He watched motionlessly as Sasuke jumped high, making some kind of pirouette before landing clumsily on one foot. Itachi's expert eyes told him from the odd angle on which Sasuke placed his full weigh at his ankle, that it was certain that the joint had sprained.

Quickly reaching his sibling, Itachi brought out a roll of bandages he kept in his pocket just in case of emergency and began to wrap the injured joint. Even though Sasuke was holding back his yelps of pain while his brother treated his ankle somewhat roughly, it was easy to tell that he was in pain. He just didn't want the person he looked up to to consider him weak. But deep inside him, Sasuke had gathered from the cold looks and the indifference his older brother sometimes implied to him, that Itachi _did _think of him as a nuisance.

"Done. How does it feel now?"

For the third time, Sasuke awoke from his thoughts. He quickly realized that most of the pain had gone, leaving a more bearable throbbing pain, now that his ankle had been firmly bandaged.

"A lot better," he managed to choke out through the lump in his throat. The boy tried to stand up, and was doing quite well until he heaved some of his weigh on his sprained ankle, causing him to stumble forwards, closing his eyes waiting for the impact. Sasuke opened his eyes when he didn't feel the harsh ground colliding with his face; instead, he found himself facing Itachi's back as the older Uchiha picked his little brother up effortlessly. Instinctively, the boy threw his arms around Itachi's neck to keep himself from falling backwards this time as Itachi began to walk back to the Uchiha District.

Just then, Sasuke found his voice again. "Hey! Who are you and what have you done with nii-san?!" he demanded loudly, making Itachi stop in his tracks.

"What do you mean?"

"Nii-san has been acting very weird for some days, and nii-san has _never _allowed me to ride on his back," Sasuke pointed out stoutly.

Itachi's eyes darkened for the briefest moment. "I can drop you if you don't want to ride on my back," he said then, his voice stoic and smooth as usual, though Sasuke could've sworn that it held some amusement.

The boy grinned widely as he hugged his brother by the neck. that was one of those pretty rare moments that the teenager would allow Sasuke to hug him.

"Now, how can you be smiling when you've just sprained your ankle?" Itachi asked, turning his head slightly as he began to walk towards the Uchiha District again. "Are you trying to get an easy ride?"

"Of course not!"

A smile found its way to Itachi's lips at the childish retort. But as soon as that smile had appeared, it was gone. Itachi suddenly felt disgusted with himself —he had allowed Sasuke to break through his emotionless mask; he was no longer _pretending _to be a good older brother, he was _being _it. Itachi cursed inwardly at his failure to keep at bay his emotions. They just made him weak —he had no use for them; emotions always got in the way. They interfered in the task he had dedicated himself wholly for some years now —the testing of his capacity.

Everyone in the clan was just a mere lifeless puppet in his master plan —and the final piece was right there, on his back, completely oblivious to his true intentions. Itachi had to make Sasuke _hate _him, not get himself attached with his little brother.

To make Sasuke hate him... The mere thought sent a foreign sting to his heart and for a second, Itachi hesitated. He quickly pushed those feelings into the darkest corners of his mind and buried them from all light.

Itachi felt Sasuke heaving a soft sigh before falling asleep, his light and small body relaxing. Itachi's thoughts were erased from his mind at this. Every bit of tension, desperation, _hate_ —they just faded away at the comforting presence on his back.

At every single clam breath his little brother took, Itachi began to awake from his numbness and for some moments he felt the unwavering appreciation and affection that his sibling felt for him, and he was content with that fleeting moment of peace in his inside turmoil.

Looking back at the forest, he felt a tingle of pride as he remembered seeing one of the kunai that Sasuke had thrown being firmly lodged on the dead center of one of the targets.

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Hi there! Just two things:  
One, English isn't my first language, but I'm working hard to correct spelling and grammar errors.  
Two, thank you for reading this. Yes, just that x3

**EDIT. 06.30.2007. **Spelling errors corrected.


	2. Chapter 1: A Freezing Wind

**  
A Weakness, a True Strength  
**_by Sirvy-cat_

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**_**Chapter One: **A Freezing Wind_

Panting hard, Sasuke let himself drop on a sitting position. His clothes were dirty and worn, but his grin of pride brightened his face's features. Most of the kunai had found their mark on the targets, boring deeply into them, the metal glinting with the sunset's last rays. _I'm catching up with you, nii-san!_

Clambering on his feet somewhat clumsily, he picked up his belongings hastily and threw his bag over his shoulder. Unexpectedly, a freezing wind cut through the air, making his clothes rustle and a few strands of his dark hair tangled with the breeze. Sasuke turned around to look at the wind's source, squinting his eyes against the cold tide. The thick, darkening forestry glared back at him, leaves being clawed down by the furious wind. The chill was unnatural in those late summer days.

Feeling a tingle of foreboding, Sasuke headed back to the Uchiha District in a quick pace. He glanced back again when the forest had become a group of black silhouettes swaying with the breeze.

The moon was shining overhead, yet it didn't seem to bring light to anything.

* * *

His brother had gone on another mission, which would take him away from Konoha for a few weeks −even months. In the meantime, Sasuke had kept himself busy, mostly training and occasionally poring over books. Having started his studies at the Shinobi Academy meant nothing but less time to train. He was also growing steadily annoyed at the gang of girls in his class whose only purpose seemed to giggle uncontrollably when he was around and steal looks at him. 

But he paid them and the rest of the people little attention as he concentrated in his studies and training, determined to keep up with his brother.

Had Sasuke paid more mind into his actions and he would easily have found that he was growing obsessed with keeping up with Itachi. He wanted for his father's attention and trust. The silent disapproval of his father was even more painful than when he was scolded openly, somehow. The need to prove his own existence was overwhelming −his father's his brother's. He wanted to prove them all that he was worthy of being part of the Uchiha Clan.

Desperately trying to reach his brother −not for hate, but for approval. Sasuke just wished to be seen not like a hindrance anymore. Those broken promises, the ever silent disapproval from his brother, were the things that hurt most.

Sasuke had promised himself he would be strong. For his mother, who simply believed in him and cared for him. For his father, who would challenge him into beating his older brother.

For his brother, who often looked down at him and lied to him, yet he somehow showed Sasuke that deep inside, he cared for his younger brother. In his usual cold ways, but he did.

Was it all right? They were brothers, and Sasuke had the strong determination to do and give everything for his brother.

But... would Itachi do the same for his younger brother?

Sasuke told himself he would, _definitely _he would. Still, deep inside his mind, the question echoed faintly, tinted with doubt.

The morning had dawned. A light mist lingered in the air, too stubborn to leave, even though the night already did. The sky was cloudy and the sun was nowhere to be seen. Faint rays brought little light to the landscape of Konoha.

* * *

An eight year old boy walked stealthily through one of his house's hallways, careful not to break the morning's silence. It was like a rule in the house −Sasuke knew his father would not appreciate a racket, specially at his cranky time. But, as ironic as life was, it was Uchiha Fugaku who broke the stillness. His chuckle was heard through the thin shojo wall of the living room, just when Sasuke was casually passing in front of it. 

Sasuke had no trouble to indentify that low chuckle −tinted with no humor but with a darker tone of pride. He knew then that his brother had returned from his month-and-a-half long mission.

A part of him wanted to greet his brother and he was readily agreeing on that, when its counterpart contradicted it. Sasuke's hand fell back to his side limply before it reached the rice paper door. Neither his father and brother would like it if Sasuke suddenly barged into the living room. He was certain that his father didn't like to be interrupted and that Itachi would simply disapprove that display of childish behavior.

Dimly hearing the monologue his father always used to praise Itachi, Sasuke backed away from the living room and continued walking on an unending corridor, unconsiously building another wall to distance himself from his affection for his brother.

* * *

Through years of coping with his brother's distant relation, Sasuke had learned a few things by himself. One of those was that if Itachi ever needed to speak to someone, he would sought them himself. It wasn't wise to hang around him or else he would eventually become annoyed of you. 

Many days after Itachi's return and his promotion to ANBU, Sasuke barely saw his brother nowadays. He seemed to vanish before dawn and he would return early in the nights just to shut himself in his room. Itachi barely made contact with anyone, not even his friend Uchiha Shisui. Even Sasuke wondered if his brother's voice would someday vanish from his memory if he kept following that schedule.

His parents had categorized Itachi's new behavior as normal for his important promotion to ANBU squad leader. But Sasuke wasn't that sure. His subconscious screamed that there was something wrong.

The day his father took Sasuke out to teach him a jutsu, he felt a pang of sadness which he masked with his excitement he felt at having his father's attention for once. Was he just a replacement for his brother? Was he just a tool to achieve the connection to Konoha that his father desired? Sasuke even started to doubt if that was what he really wanted. Gaining his father's and his clan's approval meant to be used and seen as a tool?

Shaking the thoughts from his mind as he closed his eyes, Sasuke let his father's disappointed look he gave him when he failed on his first attempt on the Gokakyuu no Jutsu flood him. He cleared his thoughts and opening his eyes once more, this time brimming with determination, Sasuke formed the hand seals, taking a deep breath and concentrating hard on the chakra's elemental recomposition. As he released the enormous fireball, he saw in his mind's eye, in the midst of the roaring flames, the distant yet familiar back of his brother, lit by a fiery yet entrancing glow. Gradually, the vivid image faded along with the fire.

Slumping down on his knees out of exhaustion, he continued staring blankly ahead. The whirl of emotions that had been plaguing him for a long time seemed to vanish away, like the dying flames. All he could feel now was emptiness. Emptiness he was somehow got used to. His life had always been empty, lacking of all meaning. He had been born into the world to surpass someone who couldn't be surpassed, and even if Sasuke succeeded, what would be the meaning of life? Which goal would he pursue then?

Barely aware of the burning sensation of his mouth and chest because of the chakra overuse, dimly registering that he was blacking out, Sasuke's thoughts whirled confusingly and finally disappeared into the darkest corners of his being, before succumbing to the welcoming darkness, both physically and mentally exhausted.

He was completely oblivious of the strong yet gentle arms braking his fall. He didn't hear the soft voice sincerely asking for forgiveness for what _he _would have to do.

* * *

When he came back to the world of the living, Sasuke paid little mind to the fact that he had gotten back to his bed after having fainted at the shores of Nakano River. He felt eager to show his father what he had accomplished. For once, Sasuke just wanted to get rid of all those thoughts for one fleeting moment, burning them away with the fire. 

As the last of his chakra was sapped away and the flames died down, Sasuke heard the retreating footsteps of his father. His face falling into a sad frown, he lowered his head, his throat constricting painfully. He had failed to meet his father's expectations... again.

Still with his back turned to his son, the older Uchiha halted in his steps, his wooden sandals hitting the pier with a hollow thud.

"...As I expected from my son."

Sasuke's head shot up as those words left his father's lips. A whirl of conflicting emotions coursed through him the next instant, making the boy feel slightly light-headed. Happiness, pride, satisfaction yet there was a strange cling in his heart, a feeling he couldn't quite understand.

Was this all right? Was that what he really wished? Had he finally accomplished the first step of his goal?

Sasuke stood alone for a long time, until the sun was bloqued out by some thick, menacing clouds. A cold breeze shook the nearby bushes, skimming the surface of the river, sending a chill up to Sasuke's spine. He didn't like that wind. Sasuke shot a wary look at the forest where his brother used to train −the place where he felt that chilling, unnatural wind for the first time.

Was it a bad omen?

* * *

Sasuke didn't notice he had fallen asleep on the tatami floor of the living room until his mother woke him up when she returned home, not bothering for the racket she was making with the rustle of plastic bags and the thumping of heavy boxes. She obviously thought that Sasuke would be awake, as always. 

Not feeling anywhere near refreshed after his short nap, Sasuke stretched and rubbed tiredly his eyes, trying to shake off his drowsiness as he headed to the kitchen to help his mother with the newly bought groceries. As he stepped into the kitchen, he shivered slightly when a cold wind entered through the open window and ripped through the dark shirt he wore.

"Oh, my! I left my umbrella at the market," Mikoto complained aloud, frowning at her own clumsiness, both hands resting on the crest of her hips.

Taking it as an indirect, Sasuke quickly told his mother he would go get it. She smiled brightly at him and then threw a glance at the gray sky through the window.

"It seems that it'll rain soon... Go quickly before it starts." Sasuke nodded and moved to leave, but his mother's stopped him. "If you see your brother −and Shisui, if he's around− tell them that I'd like to have them here for a family dinner −I'm going to cook your favorite dishes," Mikoto added and smiled too as his youngest son's face brightened.

As Sasuke left, Mikoto shut the window. Even though it was tightly closed, she could still fell and inexplicable chill.

It would be the last time she would see that smile.

* * *

The clouds were thick, dark and menacing the people bellow with a downpour of rain. Thunder occasionally ripped the still air, rumbling deeply at the distance. Sasuke walked briskly back home. It was already as dark as late in the night, the only difference was that the moon and the stars were non-existent at that precise moment and the thick clouds were the only ones that plagued the sky. He knew it was sometime between five and six o'clock, since the street lamps were still off. 

Sasuke took a path that would lead him near the far end of Nakano River −it was a deserted area, the vegetation was poor and most of it covered the highest area on the river's shores, yet there would be a fully grown tree here and there. The road was rough because of the disuse, and it would be quite easy to trip over if you weren't paying attention. A chilling wind blew softly. Sasuke tore his gaze from the worn stone steps that lead to Nakano River's shores when he saw two familiar figures at the distance with his peripheral vision.

One was lean and tall −Sasuke recognized it quickly as Uchiha Shisui. The other silhouette was obviously Itachi. Shisui was lounging on the cold and worn metal rails that followed the river's course. He seemed absorbed on his monologue, with his back turned to Itachi, who stood a mere feet away.

They didn't notice Sasuke. A sudden jerk from Itachi's arm made Sasuke's eyes widen −he was stealthily reaching out for Shisui's throat. A strange, abnormal murderous gleam eminent in Itachi's blood-red Sharingan eyes. Sasuke remained frozen where he was; he doubted his legs would obey him even if he tried to move. He knew he had to warn Shisui, yet his voice was stuck in his throat.

The wind blew again, making the hair at the back of his neck to stand on its end. Sasuke suddenly found his voice and choked out the first thing he could think of −"Nii-san!"

Both Uchihas' attention snapped to the boy's direction, Itachi's arms hung on his sides languidly the next instant, his face devoid of any emotion, yet his eyes spoke of a different tale. At the same time, a vivid smile found its way to Shisui's face, which seemed so out of place at that time. He was completely oblivious to the fact that he could have been murdered moments before.

"Yo, Sasuke!" Shisui greeted the fear-stricken boy with his usual cheerful tone.

"Aa. Sasuke," Itachi's voice rang out then, strangely acquiring a pleasant tone, contrasting with Shusui's. To Sasuke's ears, it sounded even more deadly dangerous. Itachi blocked most of Shisui's view, having stood in front of him when Sasuke called out. Shisui couldn't see Itachi's glaring dark red eyes. Sasuke had become mute due to the terror and remained rooted on the spot, unmoving, simply staring at Itachi in the eye. "I suppose mother sent you to get me for dinner?" Itachi continued, voice still mildly pleasant. Turning ever so slightly to Shisui, making sure he didn't notice the Sharingan, hidden behind midnight bangs, Itachi told him, "I apologize for having to leave earlier than I planned."

"... 'Tis fine. I'll see you another day, then," Shisui quickly excused himself, catching the hint. Turning around, he began to walk to the opposite direction, his hands tucked into his pant's bags casually.

When Shisui was just a dark retreating silhouette in the background, Itachi slowly turned back to his younger brother, his eyes narrowing with the fleeting thought that a plan he had been plotting for many years now had been ruined by _him_. How pathetic, he thought, his eyes never leaving Sasuke's as he took slow steps towards the younger Uchiha who was as still as a stone; Sasuke was so weak, so insignificant, yet such a tiny bug like him had screwed everything. In his mind, emotions were useless, yet Sasuke could still make them leak out of his cold and controlled mask. He never hesitated to kill, yet Sasuke could make him do so. How could a pathetic and powerless being like his younger brother stop him, he would never know −but he would end that matter _now._

Sasuke was his source of weakness and he would eliminate it, tear it, break it, rip it. It was that simple. An unfamiliar bloodlust fueled by his repulsion and hatred began to flood him entirely.

Sasuke's eyes were locked with Itachi's, unable to look away, just like his feet with the rough ground. Each step Itachi took echoed like a deadly drum in Sasuke's ears. The seconds lengthened to an eternity, each raspy breath he took, he could hear it clearly. Rain began to pour upon them and lighting flashed across the dark clouds. In the darkness, the cursed Bloodline-Limit was an impending omen of death.

The cold water trickling down his face seemed to get his mind to work again. Awakening from his trance, Sasuke let out a strangled sound between a choke and a yell. Falling backwards unceremoniously, he quickly crawled on his feet again, mud splashing around him, cold water hitting his skin, Sasuke ran for it, adrenalin pulsing through him and wiped his mind blank. Eyes widened in utter terror, his breath catching in his throat, the cold air freezing his lungs −any rational thought vanished from his frenzied mind−, the only thing he knew was that he wanted to get away, to run and run until he couldn't see those terrifying eyes.

But he didn't make it that far. The next thing Sasuke knew was that he was being slammed against the harsh surface of a tree trunk with brutal force, causing a cry of pain to escape from his mouth, instantly muted by both downpour of rain and booming thunder. A calloused hand gripped unyieldingly his throat, clamping him against the tree. Sasuke choked and clawed desperately against his brother's grip. His hopeless attempt to get free began to grow weaker, the knowledge that Itachi wouldn't let go began to register in. Feeling it was useless to continue struggling, Sasuke lifted his glassy eyes to meet Itachi's blood-red ones for one last time. Sasuke couldn't explain what he saw reflected in those orbs −he just knew that the one returning the gaze was definitely not his brother.

Exhaustion flooding him, coldness embracing him... the empty feeling in his entire being. Emptiness replaced the fear and it was all Sasuke could or could not feel. The rain grew more silent with each passing second, he could not longer hear the raindrops splashing with whatever surface it found first.

_Why...?_

The question rang faintly in Sasuke's mind, but nothing made sense anymore.

At that moment, he was aware of every single beat his heart made, because anyone of them could be his very last.

Was this the end of everything? His hopes, his dreams, his efforts would disappear from this world. Did that mean that his life was just a meaningless one? Was _this _really the brother with whom he laughed, admired and bowed to protect...?

"... Nii... san..." His voice sounded so distant, so dead in the might of the storm.

Feeling he couldn't resist anymore the lack of air, he let go of everything, eyes finally closing, succumbing to the world of darkness.

Yet he could see those terrifying red orbs haunting him in the nothingness.

* * *

Yeah, I'm evil and left you with a pretty cliff-hanger. I'm terribly sorry for the delay, but I somehow couldn't get this chapter right. I knew what I wanted to write yet I couldn't write it how I wanted. The next chapter's on progress, don't worry. 

Thanks to all who reviewed: _Kagi no Tensai _(Thanks for commenting!), _IsaDayDreamer, Kaira-chan15 and Amaya Uchiha 1._ You brightened my day with your kind words.

I hope to read your comments and constructive critique!

Until next chapter,  
Me!

**EDIT ****06.19.2007.** A minor error pointed out by _Amaya Uchiha 1_ has been corrected. Thanks!  
**EDIT 06.30.2007. **Spelling and grammar errors corrected.


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